Wednesday 30 May 2007

I feel sorry for Birmingham

Poor old Birmingham. It comes in for a lot of stick. Its post war architecture was first for the criticism. Then there's the accent - how many times have I heard people say that it's impossible to sound intelligent with it? And now the final blow - there are no pretty girls in Birmingham. None. Not a single one. Allegedly. According to the Miss Great Britain organizers anyway. And I guess they should know. Despite a number of fairly obvious lapses of judgement - like crowning Danielle Lloyd as Miss GB for example.

Just one question. Why, if you can't find a pretty girl in Birmingham, would you pick instead a chav-queen Colleen looky-likey from Stoke?

I mean Stoke, for goodness sake. What were they thinking?

33 comments:

eg(scotland) said...

Pikeys and Stoke - it's all getting beyond me.

Thanks to all for the help on the definition of Pikey. I was mightily reassured when Chrissie also admitted to not knowing what they were. Clearly they have not yet come north of the border.

Chrissie - good for you by the way. Nicely handled.

Not begging as such, but I would sometimes go with my Dom God to the football in Glasgow (although we are east coast he follows a team from the west). We'd park the car and you'd get a couple of wee boys coming up who would say "Hey Big Man (he's not as such a big man, but that's a Glaswegian way of addressing people) - look after your car for 50 pence?". One night I asked niaievly (spelling?) - do they really look after your car? (Yes I do have MUG printed across my forehead!). I was then enlightened - if you don't pay up then they might scratch the car but if you do then they simply move on. And who said our young people are not enterprising!

Btw - lest anyone think differently, I love Glasgow. Now Edinburgh - that's another story ....

EG

lyndyloo said...

I'm a big fan of Brimingham myself. It's a fab place, great shops, good restaurants, bars and good vibe. As I'm not actually from Birmingham I can't vouch for the pretty girls thing but I can honestly say that whenever I'm out there I've never found there to be a shortage of either pretty or not so pretty females. Some start the night as very pretty but turn very ugly by the last round and others just start out that way and get worse. I think you could make a case for all towns/citys having a fair share of all sorts of women, the good, the bad and the downright ugly!

Luv
Lyndyloo
-x-x-x-

Anonymous said...

Firstly, Moose, what are they putting in the pasties? You are coming out with some real doozies this week...I'm likin' it like that!

Anyhoo...and secondly...

The only knowledge I have of Stoke is Gordon Banks, and that is possibly the wrong Stoke...and I do not feel best placed to offer an opinion on the good ladies of the fair city of Birmingham either...

I had a curry there whilst on my way to the Lake district, one January, in the mightily heavy snow, with a group of very good friends. The friend driving our combi (yes really but it was borrowed from someone who didn't tell us that the heater packed up after about 40km) got totally fed up with trying to get out the other side (something involving a bull ring?), so we stopped to re-group and for a meal.

This is the extent of my Brum experience. As far as I remember the service was fine and the food tasty. I probably had a chicken korma.

Thank you for your time
love
hazel
x

jollygit said...

Who exactly are the Miss GB/World contests for these days? Mind you, I remember they used to be very funny to watch ...

Doesn't Robbie Williams and his gorgeous mate Jonathan Wilkes hail from Stoke?

Anyhoo, 'im indoors is from the Brum region (town right next door) and he speaks funny .... can't vouch for their looks but if you get more than two Brummie girls together, all you'll hear is "ardle ardle ardle" in high pitched voices .....

Birmingham has a new Bullring shopping centre, along the lines of Bluewater et al, where you could be anywhere in the world, except of course for the sound of "ardle ardle ardle" all around!

Sun is shining - anybody need any sent to them? The postie is about to leave so get your orders in quick!!

jollygit xx

Anonymous said...

I have never been to Birmingham, but I am thinking about going to Coventry some time this year. I was there when I was about 12 and I remember really loving the place, especially the Cathedral - it was stunning and in the grounds were the remains of the original Cathedral which was bombed during WW2.

I cannot begin to convey how long this morning has been. What were we saying the other day about drinking sensibly? Well, that went completely out the window last night! My boss suggested a drink after work, so four of us hit the pub and it got kinda messy. I was an innocent victim trapped in a web of white wine!

I got home in time for the Apprentice, so I was pretty pleased about that. It would have been just peachy, except I fell asleep on the settee, missed the entire programme and then Mr S couldn't get me to wake up! I did eventually go to bed because I woke up there this morning. Not good, really not good.

So, a quiet Thursday lies ahead for me. Does anyone else find that no matter how much water you drink, the thirst is never quenched?!

All my own fault!

C xx

Anonymous said...

Morning!

Aah the bliss of being off work - almost lunchtime and still in PJ's!!!

Stoke - used to work there - was awful then. Birmingham is fab for shopping, bars and resturants. Since the new Bullring has opened, there's much more of a cosmopolitan feel about the place - go - aside from the yam yam accent, you will be pleasantly surprised.

Now Chrissie - I used to love in Coventry (AKA Chaventry) and could wax lyrical for hours about the fact that local planners have done more damage to the local architecture than the Luftwaffe ever did, but ho hum...

Coventry City Centre has had oodles of money spent on it in recent years - honestly, you won't recognise it. I have to say though, that they have done a good job and have still ensured the original Tudor buildings in the Spon Street end of town remain - although a massive Ikea is being built next door...

Pretty girls - there are always loads of pretty girls around, just as there are unattractive girls. Perhaps the attractive young ladies in Brum are too intelligent for Miss Great Britain and recognise the competition for the crass, outdated meat market it really is?

Cor blimey - I am revved up now!

Nothing doing today - until tonight when teenager from hell is joining me on a ghost walk around a ruinous abbey later this evening. We're meeting the group in a pub car park - shame she's too young to drive!

Right, Cash in the Attic is about to reach it's climax, so I'm orff - btw - did anyone see Celeb Masterchef last night?

S xx.

Anonymous said...

I've never been to Birmingham (apart from the airport, once) so can't comment on the prettiness or otherwise of the female residents. I did used to work with a woman who had a pronounced brummie accent and I always found it hard to take her seriously ...

kipper tie anyone?

jollygit said...

Chrissie S and Sammie - my ex-hubby comes from Coventry and I'm afraid I hate the place for the nasty dark memories it brings back for me when we used to see his friends and family. Shame really, as some of the architecture is lovely and there are some beautiful areas locally .... but I can't bring myself to set foot back in the place. He moved back there after we split up and I'm terrified of bumping into him ... stupid maybe, but some memories can't be erased.

jollygit

Anonymous said...

Jollygit - my ex still lives there also! However, I still play netball there, have friends I go out with there and my son plays rugby for a club there, sooooo, not quite so easy for me to keep away. At least I don't work there anymore!

I have an ex I am terrified of though and he lives in Derby. I've only been there once since we seperated 14 years ago and that was quite hard. I kept 'seeing' him - so I do understand where you're coming from!

S xx.

jollygit said...

Sammie - thanks for understanding!

jollygit xxxx

Anonymous said...

Sammie - I'm so glad you are enjoying your week off! I would have given anything to stay in my PJ's this morning!!

Jollygit/Sammie - isn't it a nightmare that there are certain places we daren't go to? All because we might bump into someone who is the last person on earth we want to see.

A couple of years ago I went with my sister to Margate - she lived there with her now ex-husband. She was o.k. about seeing him (though it didn't happen) because he is no threat to her now, mainly due to the fact that his life is in ruins and Karma has come round to him in a BIG way. But I wanted to see him. I wanted to meet him in a pub with his mates and tell them all what an utter and complete rat he is. Only after my sister got divorced, did I find out some of the stuff he did.

Where IS all this aggression coming from?!

C xx

P.S. Keith - I loved your joke!

Anonymous said...

ChrissieS, I think you need a full Scottish inside you...

My ex is not quite far enough away. Birmingham and Margate would be too near. Six feet under would be perfect.

No ex's were harmed during the making of this feature and the above paragraph was written for comedic effect only.

I quite like Margate. I went there for a week with my first husband.

Hey Moose! I've just thought of the mushrooms again...

and analog...Tintern Abbey.

Yes 'tis.

tickley frote
love
hazel
x

on way to NC1

jollygit said...

A little boy was doing his maths homework. He said to himself, Two plus five, that son of a bitch is seven.

Three plus six, that son of a bitch is nine...."

His mother heard what he was saying and gasped, "What are you doing?"

The little boy answered, "I'm doing my maths homework, Mum."

"And this is how your teacher taught you to do it?" the mother asked.

"Yes," he answered.

Infuriated, the mother asked the teacher the next day, "What are you teaching my son in maths?"

The teacher replied, "Right now, we are learning addition."

The mother asked, "And are you teaching them to say two plus two, that son of a bitch is four?"

After the teacher stopped laughing, she answered, "What I taught them
was two plus two, THE SUM OF WHICH, is four."

Anonymous said...

Hazel - Tintern Abbey? That brings back memories of studying Wordsworth at school. That was one of our favourite jokes!

I also liked the Battle of Turnham Green (1642) for some reason. Never been there. Or to Margate either. I obviously need to get out more.

Is it me or is today going v e r y s l o w l y ? Time seems to be standing still. I've got such a lot to do before I leave my job tomorrow and can't summon up any energy to do it. P'raps I won't. I'll just leave it for the temp. Oooooh!

Anonymous said...

Jollygit - loved your joke. I love misheard lyrics-type thingies!

Hazel - I quite understand the six foot under scenario. And yes, a full Scottish would be much appreciated ....!

I'm so glad you like Margate - I loved it. And Broadstairs - thought it was beautiful. Clean and the people were lovely. I liked Canterbury too. I like Kent!

Analog - this is the slowest day of my entire 50 years and 5 months! My PJ's are calling me from home! My advice to you - leave it all for the temp!

C xx

Anonymous said...

EAMAYL

I came across a chinese restaurant called this yesterday. It took me ages to work it out!

Back later!

jollygit said...

Years ago on Nationwide (remember that programme?) they featured the Post Office and the problems they had delivering badly addressed letters and stuff. They showed one parcel with 'ARIJABA' written on it ...... it had taken ages but someone eventually realised it should have read 'Harwich Harbour' - still makes me snigger.

Chrissie S - fancy that! Canterbury is where I'm working reet now.

jollygit

jollygit said...

Analog - I'm working as a temp ..... how very dare you!!!!!

jollygit xx

Anonymous said...

analog. Leave it for the temp.

...and as though they read my mind...the chaps have just brought me a Jamaican Butty...

I had akshully already eaten having given them up for lost by about 14:15, but they'd never see me starve bless 'em!

Now they are playing with their balls and I am in danger of being clubbed to de-athe if I don't stop larfin. Even the bunnies are still eating...they know they are safe...I have fashioned a cunning water hazard from a beaker and some of Volvo's finest...

Oh, sorry, a beer can sandwich
love
hazel
x

jollygit said...

Hazel, I'm sulking now - hrrumph!

Anonymous said...

analog. Don't leave it for the temp. It might be jollygit.

jollygit said...

S'more like it, thank you xxxx

Anonymous said...

Sorry Jollygit - wasn't meant as anything personal. I've been a temp myself - they're lovely people! You're not coming to Bath are you??? In that case, don't worry - I'm not leaving it for you!!

And I'm only moving to a job in the building next door so I know that if I leave anything nasty it will come back to bite me on the bum. They know where to find me!!!! And I really am trying to finish the filing but I'm losign the will to live ...

Anonymous said...

Eat
As
Much
As
You
Like

jollygit said...

Analog - relax, I'm not coming to Bath!!!! This is my first go at temping ...... fingers crossed one of the jobs I've applied for comes off 'cos I'm not sure this temping malarkey is for me - especially when people leave you the work that they couldn't finish before they go elsewhere (only kidding!!!!!!!!!).

jollygit xx

Anonymous said...

Jollygit - an apology is all I can offer you! WHAT was I thinking of?! However, any time I have ever temped, I've always been left with all sorts of cr*p.

I worked as a temp in the US and everyone told me how hard Americans work, never take any holidays, etc. I worked for a month in the offices of a canning manufacturer and I can honestly say no-one ever broke sweat. The boss actually told me to slow down!
His name was Jeff, and he kept saying to "Ann Marie, take it e-a-s-y"! He called me Ann Marie because I was using my friends Green Card! All very illegal!

Anyway, we Brits are the bizzo when it comes to working hard!

C xx

Anonymous said...

Is the a DD in the house?

Anonymous said...

sorry, that should have said is THERE a DD in the house?

Anonymous said...

Oh, ChrissieS...what a superb secret to have!

The best secret is one known only by three people...and the other two are dead...

With any luck I'm arta here very shortly. It hasn't been that long today...tomorrow will be I spec though...and I still haven't heard from the bank...

chinn where you bin
love
hazel
x

Anonymous said...

DD is in da house!!

Is there some request with which I can assist the fair Hazel?

DD out

Anonymous said...

All

I'm hanging in there.

Six days at work until we jet off for the Road Trip.

I can't believe it is finally here.

Birmingham.

I used to work for a very large motor retail group who are based mainly around the midlands. As a result, every meeting we were obliged to attend was in the middle of Birmingham. A couple of times we were 'treated' to a stay and a night out on Broad Street.

Mmmm.

Put it this way, not my cup of tea. Mind you, if the white stilleto brigade and front row tickets to a punch up are your bag, come on down.

Anyway, off for a quick salad, glass of your finest please barman, and, hopefully, a few zzzzs.

Much love

MfR

eg(scotland) said...

Chrissie - what's come over you. F'ing n' blinding one night and getting drunk the next! Weyhey - good on you!

I took a v. big step tonight and went back to my diet club - not been there for proably the best part of 2 years. It's not WW but you can sin there.

Now trying to work out how much of the red stuff I can have for 10 sins. I know, I know, not enough!

EG

Moose said...

Just back from my belated birthday meal with the outlaws. Went to a place where I normally have the mushrooms to start but couldn't risk them today...you never know how far Hazel's influence reaches.